Motivation Where Art Thou?

By this time 3 weeks from today I will be downtown in Useless City celebrating being DONE with the barzam with my friends. While the thought of being done in a little less than 3 short weeks is thrilling, the fact that there really isn't that much time left to study is terrifying. And yet, despite how close it is, I just can't seem to get motivated to study. I wasted all of yesterday vacation planning (Fashionista and I are headed to an all inclusive resort in the Cancun area come August-WOOT!). I wasted all of Monday doing literally nothing. My biggest accomplishment of the past 72 hours has been achieving a high score of 91,000 points on Facebook Bejeweled. I'm not comfortable with the essays, my MBE score is okay but not stellar, and yet I just can't seem to kick the procrastination. Maybe I do need to have a gigantic freak out. Maybe a total breakdown would get me in the mindset that I need to be in to crank all of this out. At this point I'm not sure if the reason I'm not motivated is because I'm really actually worried about how much I have to learn and it's overwhelming or if it really is just the usual apathy that seems to have plagued me for my entire law school career.

I've spent a pretty good chunk of time the last few days trying to figure out why I can't be productive and I can't seem to pinpoint it. I tried studying by myself. Didn't work, I just kept playing bejeweled. I tried hanging out in the journal office where two other totally focused and motivated people were doing barzam work. That didn't do anything for me either. I've tried different iTunes playlists ranging from classical to upbeat rock/pop. Still nothing. Even my usual "focus" music- which happens to be the soundtrack to the first Pirates of the Caribbean- didn't help, which is particularly disturbing because that soundtrack has done the trick every time since college. The roomie and I used to put that on whenever we had papers to write and for some reason it just made us finally write stuff down on the blank page. I literally cranked out a 15 page paper in 3 hours with that soundtrack on constant repeat, but apparently it just doesn't work for studying Wills and Trusts or Federal Civil Procedure :(

I think at this point the plan for tomorrow is going to have to include some Red Bull and a strict no internet rule, thank goodness Big Wig already offered to kick my ass if he caught me on Facebook tomorrow. *sigh*

In other news, I exchanged the Tiffany's graduation gift and now own the pendant that I have wanted since I was in high school:



And as far as other things totally unrelated to the bar go, I am totally psyched for Glee this Fall on Fox, the previews that were playing during So You Think You Can Dance tonight definitely brought out my inner nerd. Trivia Boy also recently introduced me to Weeds and Entourage and I'm totally hooked. Once I have a job with $$ I'm going to have to upgrade my Netflix account and figure out a way to hook up my computer to the TV so that I can get caught up on all of the seasons that I've missed.